August 15, 2004 - 12:12 a.m.
Too Blue on a Saturday Night
Reasons that I'm not terribly cheerful tonight:
1) School starts on Monday.
2) The boyfriend is out of town.
3) I haven't done jack shit around the house all week.
4) I will soon not have any time to do things around the house, and the house is nowhere near where I wanted it to be at the end of the summer.
5) Hurricane Charley didn't even bring Savannah any rain. For some reason, this disappoints me.
6) I had an attack of social anxiety this evening. (That phrase "social anxiety" would be foreign to me except for Paxil commercials.) I was supposed to go to a friend's birthday party, but I couldn't bring myself to go. It's been a while since I've been scared to go to a social event, and it always makes me feel weak and foolish.
7) I've been off diet for a while now, and I feel like a beached whale. I'm going to see friends that I haven't seen for some time, and I really wish I could be thinner for it.
8) Even when the boyfriend tells me I'm wonderful, which he's good about doing, it doesn't help my mood. It's hard to believe you're wonderful when you really don't feel that way about yourself for the moment.
9) There's too much talking and too many breaks in Olymics coverage. I've been switching to the director commentary of "Something's Gotta Give" in the interim, which means I miss some of the Olympics. It irks me.
10) I've had a headache on and off all week. I think I can finally blame it on high counts of mold spores in the air. It makes me happier to blame mold than start hypochondriacally creating a brain tumor.
This is why I love Diaryland. Making this list has made me feel a bit better (but just a bit! I'm still wallowing!)
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